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Volume 6, Issue 3, March 2007
THE NEXT STEPS
First of all I would like to thank all of you who sent me best wishes for good health and long life. I would also like to thank you for your advice, as I know it came from the heart.
It has now been over a month since I had the open-heart surgery and I have to tell you that unless you have no feeling at all something like this is a life altering experience.
I do look at life differently. Even though I was the type of person who had very little or no stress and conflict because of adhering to the Mouradian Model, this has taken my understanding of the model to a new level. More than ever I celebrate all those in my life. I even celebrate those who I have a difference of opinion with. We all have a right to be who we were meant to be. Don't wait until tomorrow to say, "I love you" or don't wait until tomorrow to make that phone call you have thought about for the last few months. Believe it or not, tomorrow may not come. Now I don't mean to be sounding doom and gloom, but I can now tell you from experience that in one brief second your life can change forever. You have the choice to change it before it changes you.
Next I stop sweating the small stuff. As I say in my seminars, if you want to put ketchup in your coffee, that is your business and I will not get all bent out of shape over it.
Because I do not want to have conflict or misunderstanding in my relationships, I will communicate and negotiate all of my boundaries. And those boundaries will be for me and for what I need keeping in mind that I will do my best not to harm you while I am setting those boundaries.
When you want something of me I will do my best to accommodate as long as I do not loose my sense of self. I will not do anything that will stress me or create toxicity in my life.
There will be no power and ownership in my relations; I will base all of my relations on mutual trust and respect.
Finally, if the relationship is toxic I will walk away. That is really important because many of us have a real problem facing the fact that we need to change and that sometimes walking away is the only answer.
If you are unhappy with your job, then why are you subjecting yourself to eight hours a day of sadness and stress? You only have one life and you only have the present to celebrate. Why would you choose to be in a toxic job or a toxic relationship?
Keep in mind, that walking away is the last resort, once you have tried to work things out. But don't be blind to the fact that in some instances nothing will change and it is time to move on.
I am sorry if reading this you feel that I am being too strong in my language, but I know many of you who are reading this may need a wake-up call. I am here to tell you today that I have had mine, I took the call and listened to the caller, and I am going to take heed.
Don't fret over the past for it is gone and don't worry about the future for it has not yet come. Live in the present and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.
The Mouradian Model helped me through my latest 2% incident and I will follow it for the rest of my life. I am at peace!
As we meet in the days, weeks, months and years to come, I know you will notice a difference, please understand and embrace that difference for I have consciously chosen to take this new path; a path of peace, love and happiness. It is my hope from the bottom of my heart that you will be able to find true peace in your journey and that you will make everyday so wonderful that it will be worth remembering.
Blessings to you all.
Ted.
SIDEBAR
By Pierre R. Ouellette Hon.B.A., LL.B.
In the February Sidebar I set out a Case Study that I use in a lecture I give at Brock University dealing with the issue of Corporate Social Responsibility in international trade. The situation outlined touched upon a Canadian company being named a finalist with companies from India, China and Russia in a contract competition to supply communication equipment for a country in Northern Africa. The principal in the company – you – was being offered an inside track through a trusted local advisor’s ‘cousin’. What to do?
The choice of competing countries is obviously not a coincidence. These three countries ranked at the bottom of a list of 30 leading exporting countries compiled by anti-corruption advocates at Transparency International. (Canada ranked 5th and the USA ranked 9th) The multinationals from these three countries were cited as the worse offenders when it came to paying bribes when doing business abroad!
This latter fact was cause for some interesting discussion in class because, from a business perspective, they had to assume that the companies from each of these countries would most likely be dealing with their own ‘cousins’ and that all of these individuals would be asking for some manner of enticement. The immediate concern was how does one compete in such circumstances? A surprising number of students felt that they would have to match the shady business practices!
That sentiment did change – but only grudgingly – when the class was told that it was illegal for Canadian and American companies to operate in this way. In Canada the Corruption of Foreign Public Officials Act makes it illegal for Canadian businesses and individuals to bribe foreign officials to obtain or retain business. How do you think you might react in such a situation?
I must say that I do enjoy these lectures. I must, however, also admit that I still am not quite sure what to make of the subsequent ‘academic’ discussion on this topic which focused on questions relating to how one might get around these provisions! It was a little disconcerting to be able to readily offer some suggestions on point! So it really goes to wanting to do the right thing.
In next month’s Sidebar I propose to discuss why corporate social responsibility matters in this context.
As always I welcome your comments and observations. You can reach me at Pierre@CooperativeAction.com
Quote of the Month
Submitted by Brodi Mouradian
It is not what happens to us in life that counts. It is what we do about it.
--Humphry the Camel
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