Volume 2, Issue 11, November 2003

QUESTION: WHY ARE WE AFRAID TO TAKE ON THE BULLY?


My biggest frustration with people is how to get them to overcome the perceived power that the bully has in an organization.

I keep hearing people tell me that they are afraid of retaliation. “Ted if I speak up, Joe will make my life here hell.” And I don’t doubt that Joe has had that power in the past. Buy any company that has completed our Employee Relations Program that features The Mouradian Model for Cooperative Action© has the knowledge that the top management in the company is totally committed to the elimination of bullying and controlling behavior.

Let me repeat something I have said many times before…FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. Maybe Joe had the power in the past, but I can assure you he is powerless now.

Here is another saying…“The world is a scary place. Not because of the people that are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.”

The only power the bully has is what we allow him or her to have. Yes, we give the bully the power by allowing ourselves to be the victim. Let me put it another way, just in case you didn’t get it. By refusing to become a victim you render the bully powerless.

Let me throw out a caution here. I am talking about mental corporate bullying. I am not talking about street gang physical bullying. Please make sure you keep yourself physically safe.

Back to the corporate bully. If the boss has not backed the employee when the employee has concerns about a supervisor then the employee will shut down, will not complain, be unhappy and put up with the bullying of the supervisor. Even when the boss says, “Trust me, I will back you up”, the employee will still be gun shy if no real support was evident in the past.

The key is to empower and support the employee whenever the employee points out concerns regarding a supervisor’s behavior.

Here are some simple keys to empowering the employees when it comes to corporate bullying.

1 - Do not ever dismiss an employee’s comment as being trivial.

2 - Do not make excuses for your supervisor.

3 - Hold your supervisor to a high code of conduct.

4 - Allow the employee to go over the supervisor’s head as a last resort in order to bring inappropriate behavior to light.

5 - All supervisors and employees must be treated equally when it comes to a code of conduct.

6 - Employees must feel safe when confronting their supervisor’s behavior.

7 - Make sure that the supervisor clearly understands that any retaliation towards an employee who brings forth bullying behavior will result in immediate and harsh consequences.

When people fully understand the code of conduct that is enshrined in The Mouradian Model©, there will be no need for bullying and no need for the boss to intervene.

All staff will celebrate and validate each other’s actions while not allowing insignificant habits to get blown way out of proportion. Each person in the interaction will know how to communicate respectfully, directly and honestly to bring a clear understanding to all their interactions.

Each staff person will constantly look for a balance and equilibrium in order to create a cooperative action. No one will exert power and ownership over anyone else. There will be mutual trust and respect.

Finally, all employees and management will understand fully that acceptance is not necessarily agreement and when the relationship becomes toxic they will know how to walk away.

Do not fall victim to the false power of the corporate bully. By confronting their behavior calmly and respectfully you will render the bully powerless.

Ted

Humphry says…


“The pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of making the change.”


FEEDBACK

“Great article ...this one gave me a great picture good stuff....”

Sheldon Rodgers, Broker
Marketplace Insurance


Brodi’s Bits

As the year is soon coming to a close, I would encourage anyone that is interested in using Ted’s services to book now and lock in this year’s fees. Spring will fill up with conference dates and seminars and his time will become limited.

Also, if you have any ideas for seminars or programs that you don’t see on our website, please let us know and we can customize something for your group. Please visit us at www.CooperativeAction.com.



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